Size of smile matters
A Typical Lecturer Straight from Satan's Cave.
Chapter 6
The Sir looked unembellished, in his late 40's with a nerdy glasses, a typical lecturer straight from Satan's cave. That's how he looked at the 200 students standing in front of him.
'His sinister smile is his trademark I guess',Jeeva whispered .
'Muddddhheedaaa",I whispered back.(it means shut up,but if u add some tune to the word while whispering ,it might means stfu too).
'How many foreigners are here? Raise your hand!',that was the first sound we heard from his mouth.If you were him, you could see about 20 raised hands while all the local student's head turned towards us, scanning and counting in their heads.I noticed some of students from our group of 20 seems proud of themselves.The proud smiles were there on their faces as if they going to receive a medal .Meanwhile the remaining us looked nervous -and I'm one of them.
'All move to the middle,tara teri',he said using the microphone..
The sir asked us to move to the middle of the lecture hall;to the stairs and we were clueless.Damn.It was way worse than what I imagined Jeeva might caused.That's how I felt. The lecture hall was in a mourning silence..
"I studied in UK,' he uttered few words and linked it to his college life.
"They used to bully me lot.So I don't respect them too',he continued while we were standing in the middle,on the stairs, holding our pen and books, listening to him with full attention.
'So sit on the floor.That's what you get from me",he concluded.
I was just 3 when some Britain junkies bullied him.'It wasn't his fault.He was gifted with such an annoying face that ended up with people bullied him',Shaun whispered.Shaun is a modern Punjabi boy from Malaysia too.He is my new classmate too along with Mugil,Raj,Roshan and few others that I still can keep remember.He never wears a turban,that is why I meant him 'modern'.
Since we don't have any options ,we sat on the floor.
'what the fuck la this?Is this why paid so much to be here,sitting on the floor",Jeeva asked me slowly.
'If he see us talking,don't know what else he might do la..So shut up and just write something',I said.
Some of the Malaysian girl showed 'seriously??' kind of face, while the boys just goes with the tide like an emotionless statues except this boy from Ipoh,Ajay.I only met him once in this few days and he was abnormally friendly then.. He was seriously down and his facial muscles couldn't hide it.
Who wouldn't actually? You wore your new fresh whitish lab coat and the reality was you have to sit on the floor..The floor that hundreds of muddy and dusty slippers just walked onto- a pair of it was mine, just replace the slipper with shoe. With his nicely ironed blue shirt and polished black shoe, it definitely wasn't a pleasant morning for him,and us..and definitely not a good start for any student..
10 minutes before 12pm,he ended the class and walked his way out...
to be continue..
Island and I
What's special about the isolated island in the picture..Anyone that have been here will knw what's special about this archipelago ..When we reached there, we met two Czech guys that was kayaking along with us.(but we reached first,biasalah)..One of them was 202cm tall ..His height made me curious and that's how I started the conversation. Okay, let's skip the random shit, but one of them was talking about what will happen if they trapped on an island. Well, everyone knws abt Robinson's story that we read during our secondary school.I can't recall the real Robinson C's name, bt he survived many years on that island with Friday because there was plenty of fresh water for his survival on that Island.
Drinking sea water would actually be a squit-ticket to die, since it will fry your kidney..So let me share about the last thing u can do when u trapped on an Island and you can't find fresh water to drink. That's when I felt i should tell him about enema.An enema may be used as a last-resort method for rehydration, particularly if the only available fresh water is contaminated and unfit for drinking..(if you drink the dirty water, then you will die sooner due to severe dehydration caused by vomiting and diarrhoea.) The reason is that the water would be readily absorbed by the colon while avoiding any gag reflex and vomiting caused by the contaminants.
#donttryitathome
#justaninfo
#ifyouknwBearGrylls
#thenyouwillknwallthis
Relationship Goals:Sucks
Maybe the past is like an anchor,
Holding us back..
Maybe you have to let go,
of who you were,
to become who you will be..
Lakdhes. . .
Jungle trekking-moments
Lol..
Comment if you know..
How to sleep better
1.Establish a regular bedtime and a relaxing bedtime routine—examples might include taking a warm bath or listening to soothing music.
2.If you can’t fall asleep after 15 to 20 minutes, get out of bed and go into another room. Do something relaxing, such as reading quietly with a dim light. Don’t watch television or use a computer, since the light from their screens has an arousing effect. When you feel sleepy, get back into bed. Don’t delay your scheduled wake-up time to make up for lost sleep.
3.Use your bed only for sleeping or lovemaking. Avoid reading and watching television in bed.
4.Don’t take long naps during the day. If you need a nap, restrict it to 20 to 30 minutes in the early afternoon.
5.Get plenty of exercise. Build up to 45 minutes of moderate exercise nearly every day. Get your exercise early in the day. Try some easy stretching exercises or yoga to relax your muscles and your mind at bedtime.
6.Whenever possible, schedule stressful or demanding tasks early in the day and less challenging activities later. This helps you wind down at the end of your day.
7.Don’t go to bed hungry, but don’t eat a big meal right before getting into bed. If you want a bedtime snack, keep it bland and light.
8.Limit caffeine and consume none after 2 p.m.
9.To decrease middle-of-the-night urination, don’t drink any fluids after dinner.
10.Avoid alcohol after dinnertime. Although many people think of it as a sedative, it can get in the way of quality sleep.
11.Be sure your bed is comfortable and your bedroom is dark and quiet. Consider a sleep mask or earplugs.
12.Practice relaxation breathing. Use slow breaths, especially when you exhale.
Murmur
Heart murmurs are sounds produced by turbulent blood flow in the heart, particularly the heart's valves. Heart murmurs can be found in babies or develop later in life. Generally murmur is not a condition,but a sign which will leads to condition like mitral regurgitation and aortic stenosis .That is why sometimes student have to study murmur along with MR,AS etc.
It can be classified according to:
Timing and Cadence
Systolic murmurs occur between the first heart sound (S1) and the second heart sound (S2). Diastolic murmurs occur between S2 and S1. In addition, timing is used to describe when murmurs occur within systole or diastole. For example, early systolic, midsystolic or late systolic.
Duration
Heart murmur duration refers to the portion of systole or diastole that the murmur occupies. Terms used include short and long. Murmurs lasting throughout systole are referred to as holosystolic or pansystolic.
-pansystolic murmur usually associated with mitral regurgitation.
The first and second heart sounds are normal but
a mid-frequency rectangular murmur fills all of systole.
Pitch
Evaluation of the murmur's pitch should be made by classifying the pitch (frequency) as low, medium or high. The stethoscope's bell can be helpful with low pitched sounds while the diaphragm is used for medium or high pitched sounds.
Shape
Some murmurs are described by the sound's shape. Common classifications include crescendo (increasing intensity), decrescendo (decreasing intensity), crescendo-decrescendo (increasing then immediate decreasing intensity). Crescendo-decrescendo is also called diamond shaped. Rectangular, also termed plateau indicates a heart murmur of constant intensity.
Tonal Quality
Listen for additional aspects of the murmur's sounds. Heart murmurs may have qualities that can be noted as musical, harsh, blowing, booming, sharp or dull.
Respiration and Patient Position
Respiration or patient position can influence murmur intensity as well as heart sound splitting. Generally , murmurs increasing with expiration originate with left side (aortic or mitral) valves, while murmurs increasing in intensity with inspiration originate with tricuspid or pulmonary valves.
Additional:
1.diastolic murmur- a heart murmur heard at diastole, due to mitral obstruction or to aortic or pulmonic regurgitation with forward flow across the atrioventricular valve; it has a rumbling quality.
2.prediastolic murmur- one occurring just before and with diastole, due to aortic regurgitation or pulmonic regurgitation.
3.presystolic murmur- one shortly before the onset of ventricular ejection, usually associated with a narrowed atrioventricular valve.prediastolic murmur one occurring just before and with diastole, due to aortic regurgitation or pulmonic regurgitation.
4. mitral regurgitation - a disorder of the heart in which the mitral valve does not close properly when the heart pumps out blood.
5.aortic stenosis -is the narrowing of the exit of the left ventricle of the heart.It may occur at the aortic valve as well as above and below this level. It typically gets worse over time. Symptoms often come on gradually with a decreased ability to exercise often occurring first. If heart failure, loss of consciousness, or heart related chest pain occurs due to AS the outcomes are worse. Loss of consciousness typically occurs with standing or exercise. Signs of heart failure include shortness of breath especially with lying down, at night, and with exercise as well as swelling of the legs. Thickening of the valve without narrowing is known as aortic sclerosis.
Sunrise :A different day,different questions
a year
How to overcome Depression
How to be happy?
How to be more confident?
How to be attractive?
Is there any ways?
The answer depends on you.Others can only guide you,but end of the day,it's all about you.
Why people become depressed?
What is depression actually..?
Wikipedia define depression as a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person's thoughts, behavior, feelings and sense of well-being.
Science addressed it as a feature of some psychiatric syndromes such as major depressive disorder.
People with depressed mood can feel sad, anxious, empty, hopeless, helpless, worthless, guilty, irritable, ashamed or restless. They may lose interest in activities that were once pleasurable, experience loss of appetite or overeating, have problems concentrating, remembering details or making decisions, and may contemplate, attempt or commit suicide. Insomnia, excessive sleeping, fatigue, aches, pains, digestive problems or reduced energy may also be present.It's a lot of shit,but you will never understand it fully without experience it.
What depressed people do is,they isolate them self from others,They feel no body cares about them.They want to be alone.But deep inside,they need someone ,something that can help them to overcome it.Who the fuck likes and want to be depressed in the first place.As the last solution,they will commit suicide and end their life when all the prescribed drugs failed to help them.Before they choose the ultimate decision,they will search on net for ways to overcome depression without contact someone in person.The feeling will be like you're drowning and you really,I mean really wish that someone will give a hand to you and bring you out from your misery.
1.So,what is the way to overcome this.It took me many years to find the real solution and I decided to share it with others.Who cares how many people will read this,how many people will comment on this post.I don't care.Confidence is not 'they will like me'.Confidence is 'I will be fine even if they don't.'First of all,how do I know how many people likes me out there with this uncertain world.Human are good pretender.So,never care about others.That is the first step you apply to avoid being depressed thinking you're not good.The moment you compare yourself with others,that moment it self you are below them.Never compare your self with other doesn't matter how successful they are.Some might be an athlete ,a bodybuilder,a successful business man,entertainer,public figure.You might compare your self for not being them,but wait..Did you try nor put any effort to be like others?
But you're good in comparing with others since comparing is easy.Sounds unfair?Definitely yes.
Stop comparing with others.You never know your capability without trying.You might be the same level as others when you try.Maybe a step above them.So,don't judge yourself without trying and doing something .
2.and about people being depressed because of relationship, do you know what is the main culprit for this?We never get enough care and attention from our partner.When this happened,we never move on but still going after them and get nothing but shit.One reason why people keep going after their useless partner is love.Others might be memories.Correct?What is love?Just a cocktail of endorphins and P.E.A that drives us crazy.We might think we will never find someone like them again,anymore.Bullshit.You will smile for your stupidity when you get someone better than your ex a day.The reason why we going after them again and again and why we can't move on and why in the first place we seeking for their attention is the same reason.We are not busy enough with ourselves .We don't love our self and that's why we can't decide what we like and do it on our own.Since we are being lifeless and from no where,when someone like us and we are in a relationship,all we need is their time and attention.How can we expect others to do the same for us in the name of love.Love is about being strongly a part and being strongly together at the same time.They will do their own stuff and you will do your own and at the right time,you both will go for a date,interact,cuddle,what ever shit it is,you both should do it together at the right time,but definitely not 24/7.If one partner is lifeless and and got nothing better to do,that is the moment when love Satan arise.So,the problem is not with the partner,but you(I'm not including the assholes that betray and having many girlfriends and boyfriends at a time).Keep yourself busy and productive.Then you will know the difference.
3.and for those who being depressed with studies, ..
Hemicrania Continua
Persistent One sided Headache(for easy search)
1.Headache for more than 3 months fulfilling other 3 criteria
-Unilateral pain without side-shift
-Daily and continuous, without pain-free periods
-Moderate intensity, but with exacerbations of severe pain
-Conjunctival injection and/or lacrimation
-Nasal congestion and/or rhinorrhea
-Ptosis and/or miosis
A variant on hemicrania continua has also been described, in which the attacks may shift sides, although meeting the above criteria in all other respects.
Happy Birthday :A gift for you.
From her eyes,I could realized that she is getting mad at me.The moment I took a cigarette from Marlboro box,the smiling face changed drastically into a look that I can't explain.It was cute.I just keep looking at her while trying to light it with a matchbox.-Lighting a cigarette with a matchbox is more stylish than lighting with a lighter.
Lakdhes..
A personal Note for My Future
Dear friends,followers,readers of this blog..I'm sure most of the views are by medical students.Thanks for the comments and for adding me on Instagram and Facebook.Thanks to the mails too.It made my day.Those who interested to gain medical knowledge and share it to the world,do like this page here:
Infomedic
and those who interested in gossips,politics ,latest issues,do like this page :
Boss,Teh Tarik Satu.
I know no one will read this post.Who cares..
This blog of mine is solely for memories recall purpose..One day,I will read back,from the beginning and smile myself.Maybe my kids will read all this too.If it is so,dear kids,I'm more notorious than my look.Please learn from my mistakes and be a better person than me. Life will be hard.You might read somewhere how bad is depression.But,trust me..You only will understand it when you face it by your own.Again,trust me,it can be overcome too.So,don't worry much,don't give a fuck about what others tell you,don't be shy,live your life the way you want.If you'r wrong,learn from the mistake and never do it again.In life,everything is about memories..Create lots of memories so that you can cherish it with anyone.From memories you will earn the knowledge beyond what is written in your books.So,choose wisely and create good memories..And remember,expectation is a disease.So,don't expect lot.
And for those who are reading this now,yes it's you..I don't know you,but thanks a lot for choosing this page.I would be more glad if I can be in your friend circle..Have a nice day.
by
Lakdhes
Sometimes When You Win,You Lose.
Money is numbers and numbers never end,
If it takes money to make you happy,your search for happiness will never end.
Wonder why people don't understand it.In the beginning,during my admission in this medical college,the college administrative department said no such thing as paying extra tuition fees after 5 years.Let say you failed and have supplementary examinations,you only have to pay the term fees and exam fees after your 5th year.Even last year,when the embassy came and had a meeting with principle to ask why the Malaysian students keep failing in their exam while other foreigners passed,he mentioned the same-Only have to pay for the academic years.
But now they said new rules and asking extra money for the upcoming year once you finish your fifth year and having supple exams.How could from no where they creating new rules and wanted to implement it.If there is a new rules,it should be start for the new admission right..Only place on earth that will do such crazy things is here.
Wonder how long and how much they want to steal from innocent students.If this kind of fucked up system being implemented,then what is the guarantee that they won't simply fail the student for money.
Now itself,if we go for exam,some don't like boys,some don't like girls,some don't like dark skin students and etc..Bias..Sometime they asked about our prime minister,palm oil ,Tun Mahathir ,talk cock and said the viva finish.When the result comes out,we failed in viva.So,if they already decided to fail Malaysian student,then why have to take the exam and creates such dramas.Passing at this place is all about plain luck and the examiner's mood.If he or she in good mood,you will pass. I guess ,we did a big sin in our previous life.That's why we ended up here.. :P
Basically we trapped here.Can't move forward and can't stop and go somewhere else.Age,parents,money ,everything have to be considered.Definitely we can't start fresh again,anymore.
One of my friend,he is a smart student,was doing pre medic at Indonesia and wanted to continue his M.D there,but this agent lady,brainwashed his parents(including my parents)to send their kids here,to Bangladesh.She promoted this place by using her daughter,(the daughter was studying here that time).But few years back,she transferred her daughter to Indonesia because that agent lady knew that it's hard for foreigner to pass here.Such a bitch.She simply spoiled many students life for money.Such a greedy fat witch.And that boy,till now still couldn't clear the first professional exam.Whenever his father called and asked,will you finish this year..I really feel bad and angry with that agent lady.. Basically ,the agent cheated us for money.Hope she will understand a day that money is numbers and numbers never end,
If it takes money to make us happy,our search for happiness will never end.Wishing myself to pass and get my ass out of this place soon.
By
Lakdhes
A weird man in between Earthquake and the Chaos

With the Nepal earthquake and recent Bangladesh earthquake alert's warning,nothing could frighten you more,especially staying in an eight storey apartment building.Since two days,we kept feeling the tremor.People are running down using staircase,reciting muslim prayers,screaming.The environment was terrifying.
Well,as my housemates are still back in Malaysia,I'm alone for now.So,each tremor is a nightmare.It wasn't a normal tremor.Since the first time I came here until now,I had felt few tremors from the earthquakes,but this one was the longest.Usually,it lasted for seconds,but this one was quite long and strong.Fortunately,my building standing still.I just prefer stay in my room .Definitely I'm not gonna die today.So,why wasting my time,pack my necessary stuff like passport,document,money and etc,run down, and at last nothing happens.
Today,I was sitting in the hall and was reading something.Suddenly,I heard people shouting and I turned to look at the glass of water that I kept on a chair to see if the building is shaking.The tremor wasn't that strong but still scary.Then I turned and look at the opposite building through my transparent sliding door.I saw a man,in his hall at the opposite building,maybe 5th floor,opened his arms like the hero in the movie Titanic and standing doing nothing looking up.It was really surprising seeing someone stand there without trying to escape but welcoming his death.I wonder,even how egoist a person is about not afraid to die,he will find thousand reasons to stay alive when a gun pointed to his head.But this guy,seems happy if the building collapse and end his life.Weird humans.
By
Lakdhes
Step out of your comfort zone
Despite the fact that my photography sucks,yet I love to cherish the memories in the form of this new hobby..I thought singledom will not last a lifetime,so I decided and went on a date with myself for 39 days.This time,there is no one to hold me back but myself solely. Surprisingly I met new people,new friends perhaps.I realized that friendships are paramount.I learnt new things from each one of them.It is always us that separates ourselves from others.
So,I took a step to break the barrier ,and you know what,it works well.I'm sucks at relationships too other than photography.Then I realized again that if you are uncomfortable spending time alone with yourself, what makes you think anyone else will feel comfortable spending time with you.Being happy alone does not happen overnight for me especially with the fact that I'm recovering codependent.All this doesn't mean I don't love a girl.I still love her and I'm just taking sometime to know my self better so that I can take care of her and be a good partner ,better than before with her.
Being alone can be a positive force, turning you towards greater creativity and greater personal development. In this space that you call your own, you can grow to know and love yourself as a separate individual. One who is not dependent on another human being for your identity and does not fixate or keep moving around seeking pleasure, seeking comfort, and satisfaction from the energy of another being.The lesson I learnt and wish to share with everyone is-Step out of your comfort zone and rediscover yourself.
by Lakdhes
The first Lesson I Learnt in My Medical School
Chapter 5
From the dissection hall,we went to the lecture hall.Honestly,I have no idea what subject's lecture was it.I just follow other classmate because I knew that our time table should be the same,What I know by then was,the break time is from 11 am to 11.30am.This break doesn't matter much since they don't have a decent canteen or cafe in their college.This time,I'm adamant not to sit at the last row.The first lesson I learnt in my first class during my first day in medical school-never sit at the last bench.
Yet,I manage to get a place just 3 rows front away from the last bench.
Jeeva was sitting beside me again.I just wished he won't be a pain in the ass anymore .Jeeva was from Penang too.I met him in S.M.C,a tuition centre specially for Indian students.Most went to that centre just to use it as a pathway to mingle with girls and those who are lucky,they might end up in a relationship. Jeeva was from Butterworth,a city in the mainland,45 minutes from my place,Alma.I wasn't close with him during S.M.C days.In fact,I hate him for a reason.
It was two months from the beginning of S.M.C and we was having an English class.I can't recall the sir's name but Jeeva was his favorite student.The English Sir asked the whole class to write a poem in English. All the student were busy writing something.I don't know whether they were really writing poem or pretending doing so to avoid the strict sir's endless lecture.
At the moment,I was busy talking Kollywood stories with my last bench mates.-again,the last bench.
The sir asked Jeeva to recite his poem.I just avoid all the agenda and continue my stories.Jeeva stood in proud,as if a real poet and crapped something annoying.The sir praised Jeeva to a level that he might carry him to his head and dance.From no where,the Sir noticed me and asked me read mine,loudly in front of the class.
I went in front and standing there like an idiot,smiling and looking at my last bench mates.I saw Jeeva,still clouded in proud and gave an embarrassing look at me.
'Faster recite your poem loudly',the Sir yelled.
I still stand quietly.
He came ,pulled my book that I was gripping in my hand and looked at it..Nothing was there except a drawing of a duck with a fat male cartoon resembling the sir.He threw the book at me.The book hit my chest and fall down.At that moment,it wasn't just the book,but my heroic image too went into the drain.I can't control my temper anymore.As an add on,few girls from Butterworth Convent laughed at me. Swathi one of them,the prettiest girl in the class.How could I control my anger anymore??
I turned to the Sir and sounded him,'fucker,if you utter one more word,I will break your face!'.
The sir zipped his mouth and stood in shock.The whole class turned into silent ,as if in a mourning ceremony It was my last day in that tuition, a place where they torture students by having their classes early morning during weekends.On that day,I got independence from S.M.C,but not from Jeeva because he was my College-mate during pre-medic.Even then ,I hate him because he was a bully.
All the student stood up the moment the saw a Sir entered.
to be continue,..
First Anatomy Class
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If you're reading this,first of all congratz.Now let's get into business.What I'm going to share here is basically my mistakes...