7.4 Billion Human

No one is behind in life.There's no schedule or timetable that we all must follow.It's all made up.Wherever we are right now is exactly where we need to be.Seven point four billion people can't do everything in exactly the same scheduled order.We all are different with variety of needs and goals.Some get married early,some get married late while others dont get married at all.Some get divorced two years after married while some stick together til the end.What is early?What is late?Compared with whom?Compared with what?Who is right and who is wrong ?Yet criticism is vital,fun for some,a hobby for few.Some want children,others don't.Some want a career,others enjoy taking care of a house and children.Some prefer ego while some needs laughter.Our life is not on anyone else's schedule.Dont beat yourself up for where you are right now.Skinny,jobless,poor,fat,dark,with scars,not in a happy relationship,life doesnt seem smooth compare to your friend?..Its your timeline not anyone else's and nothing is off schedule.The journey isn't abt becoming anything.Its about unbecoming everything that isnt you so you can be who you were as you were created.

Enthusiasm is Common but Endurance is Rare

'You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with',rit..?
When the five of them suckz in their own way,I sensed that doesnt matter how focused I be,eventually my willpower gt drained along.One is selfish,one is aimless,one take things for granted,one is super lazy,and one is the combo of all above.After trying for months,I realized its much wiser to change the circle than trying to change the people who are extremely comfortable in their zone.Otherwise it leads to misunderstanding or we should lead by an example.Its hard to bring the synergy with some I realized.Many had the interest but in the end I learnt that enthusiasm is common but endurance is rare because of human's ego.
If you come at me with your fists doubled,I can promise that mine will be doubled as fast as your.If you come to me and say,"lets sit down and take counsel together and if we differ from each other,understand why it is that we differ,we will presently find that we are not so far apart after all.The points on which we differ are few and the points on which we agree are many;only if we have the patience,candour and the desire to get together,we will get together.Otherwise u r not my type of people and we cant get along for long term.

Get Well Soon Brotha

After more than a week,finally he's out of ICU and msgd me.The first thing he sent, 'bro I have returned to normal'. ☺

Glad to hear that,some sort of invisible relief perhaps.It feels really awkward when someone that msging and talking to us almost everday suddenly isnt there anymore.Its fine if its temporary but when its permanent;I hate that feelings.In the beginning each demise especially on my arms ruined my whole day..With time it bcm normal.Doesnt matter how normal it became,when something happened to someone that I knw,the heartache never fades doesnt matter how many life departed infront of my eyes..I wonder why it feels that way..best friend..?I dont think so I have one.Someone is there with us today,smiling with us,scold us,driving us crazy,irritate us,at times we felt how nice if we're just alone without such nuisance..When they isnt there anymore,thats the moment the heart and mind seeks so much to talk with,for forgiveness,one last chance,one last time to  spend time with n etc..How funny it sounds..How silly we are at times I wondered...It took absence and pain to make us realize the worth of something or someone.How nice if this kind of appreciation for a person remains 24/7 in our head,keeping our phone a side when someone is talking to us,never talk bad abt sumone cz we knw that tmrw is uncertain ...Each day,each lesson turning me into someone that I wasnt yesterday..

Get well soon brotha.

Cancer Cure

I learnt the way how they cured those diseases bck then.Eventho they didn gv proper details hw to bring it into action they shared the stuff,food,metal,envrmntl energy n ways what causes cancer n hw to cure it bck then.Almst al of them was related to what I learnt frm my Onco books tdy.There was only one cmplte diffrnce.That book clearly stated the effct of food to human body,cancer n the cure.Despte the  ecological triad(host agent n envrmnt to cause a disease in a vectr), mega institute stated tat food gt no cnction with cncer,it reduce the risk but doesnt cure the disease.Is that cmpny's monopoly for their revenue lk tobacco n weed, cancer n chemo for the net profit of billions of dollars annually,Oni God knws.).Whn this era ends by Feb 6898,evntho human dies within the age of 20,homosapiens n their greed wil never stop.whatever fck it is,i learnt a valuable cue from that book hw to cure that disease even it sounds skeptical.Frst I learnt hw to make it in an easy way unlike CsCl n DCA tat too expnsve n far,one frm US and one frm China,then how to apply them, then hw long to use it etc..Let see what it does. Even small scale busness bcm a victm of blck magic,cmption,ganstr n greed.So it mght b wise  to follow Musk's strategy without gtin myself killed.No body gona love an easy non profit way for sure excpt for those who wish and pray to live another 5 years.At time,value of life oni can b seen when we knw our expry date.

Mahabaratha

• Since I entered med school,I wished to create a cure for cncer.For years I was stdyin biochem,pharma,patho n onco way earlier to figure out my own way for it.Tru my blog,I learnt tat the combo of CsCl to chnge the acid base balance into more alkaline ph of bdy,Na DCA to accelerate apoptosis of mlgnt cells with b complx to cmbt the side effct do works as few claimed frm my exprnce bt none of them mail bck the report that I asked to satisfy myself wit the result.Then I realze abt law n protocl n stopped jeopardizin myself.Recently my sis msgd me abt sumtin n I used that opprtnty to askd abt major Sanskrit epics of ancient India cz she knw more abt it.She patiently answrd al my qstn bt I realzd I cnt nag her mch..So i tried to learn myself to gt a clear pictr of it.Few days back I was tlking abt  Genghis Khan the notorious,lusty n devilish asshle ranked first for male with the most children in history .Then I was wondering about Gandhari whom had 100 kids(male) n 1 girl hving the same age.A woman ovulates about 400 eggs during her reproductive life bt 100 kids at a time made me curious.I went bck digged for details abt it n realized bascly the clonin,test tube baby,surrogate mother,atomic bomb etc was there thsnd years bck b4 our civilization learned,tested n applied it.When I saw J R Oppenheimer's reply I wondered the cure for cancer shld b in that book too n looked back into tat book.

Happiness

We went to the cashier to pay the bill.I have 2000tk in my wallet n my frnd had 2500tk with him.Both of us doesn't seems happy at all eventho our stmch was full with food.I saw this guy came wit his frnd.Unlike us,they jst ate rice,dhal n sum vege.Both of them opened their wallet to pay the bill.I saw both of thm roughly hv few 100tk n few 50,20tk notes with them..One of them took the money slowly frm the wallet n paid the bill for both of them n leaved the shop with laughter n joy.I looked at them then trnd n looked at my frnd.Why tf we arent happy as them..?,I wondered.That nite I realizd action seems to flw feelings,bt rly action n feelin go tgtr n by regulating the actn whch is under the more direct cntrl of our will,we can indirectly regulate the feeling whch is not.It isnt wat u hv or who u r or whr u r or wat u doin tat make u happy or unhappy.Evrybdy in the wrld is seeking hppiness n one sure way to find it is by cntrlling our thoughts I realzd.Happiness doesnt depend on outwrd cndtions.Its depends on the inner cndtions.One is miserable n othr is happy.Why ?I asked my self again..Ltr I realzd, its bcz of a diff mental attitude.

Stress

At times its bttr to answr aft being questioned.One of my frnd asked me why I alwys seemed busy.Honestly I keep myself busy jst to gt used to it.Most of the time physical stress without proper rest leads to mental stress n thats leads to pressure.Lack of sleep is one of the major cz of it so by makin my self get used to it,loading with cortisol n managing it wil help in cmg mnths I realzd.Whenever I felt overwhelmed by pressure,I ask myself what is the worst case scenario wil hpn frm this..It leads to some level of cmfrt unlike the beginning.2nd is control..I make a list of things in my control and things beyond my cntrl rgrdng it.I ignre those beyond my cntrl n for things under my cntrl,I qualify top 3 controllable issue.There might be 6,7 issues bt by paying close attention,I realzed oni the top 3 matter the most n the rest 3 is jst cz overthinking.4th prioritizing the root ..This is by making the top 3 into 1 and see what is the actual cause n keep asking why hw why why n go into the deepest why n try to solve it.Brain handle one task better at a time.Multi tasking is fine with physical activities bt I realzd in order to solve an issue mentally,focus is imprtnt like trainin muscles otherwise mind muscle connection cant b achved.Same goes to prb,handle one at a time n move on otherwise solution wil be hard n wil take away our peace n smile for weeks.One at a time is the key when its involvin brain n emotion.

Peer Pressure

Pressure
Months bck,when i had prb wit exm,I seek advce frm a frnd of mine that was clse wit me then.Despte al the explntn she advcd me frm her point of view sumtin irrelevant.I realzd sumone tat sailing smooth wouldnt undrstnd abt rough seas and almst everyone claimed tat thy dnt hv time for othrs cz thy r 'busy'.Most listen not to understnd bt to say sumtin literally react rather than respnd.Hwever that day,cz of that reaction I cm to a point that if pressure n stress hit me hard again,I cant depend on others.I need my own formula n ltr I created one that works well for me n my frnds.I sensed lot of ppl that seems rich is rich cz they can handle tremendous amnt of pressure,bttr than the average ppl.The pressure that I meant isnt wrking 14hrs in a hsptl under someone's order n end of the mnth earn a salary.That wrk pressure for mnth's end salary wil b never ending if I go with the flow wit a victim's mentality.Doesnt mttr hw many ppl lyin that they love their job,for some,wrking in an over populated hsptl slowly make them feel like thy missing some part of their life I realzd.That so cld healthcare bcm sickcare n whle handling sickness of others I cant make myself sick of life.It wil make the service bcm 'work for the sake of money' mindset as it is nw.For that ppl stdy more n more,not to be exprt bt for the sake of mny cz the competition is gettin bad day by day.The pressure that Im addressing shld plant a seed in life not plucking the flwers away n extrme pressure nvr result in efficacy in any field of work I learnt.

Books

My frnd askd me,wtf im reading bsnss books whn im doing medicine.One of my frnd tat stpd med halfway frm Russia askd if I did the same.. No such thing by god's grace.I believed I didnt chse Bangladesh,bt that cntry chsd me 4 a reasn n hit me hrd with exprncs n lssns tat mny wnt evn dream abt.My frnd used to told me that I shld regrt wit things I had done in the pst whnevr tld him I dnt.Regret is the most abundant pessimism that majority of us faced.Its oni hard to see optimistic persn,negtivty is easy.I usd regret as a tool too bt i dnt regrt regrdin past.Past is a lesson,i usd regrt n flip it into my sort of postvy.I think abt future and initiate the regrt by thnkng wat if I didn do this n tat.Wat wil hpn 2 yrs frm nw if I didnt do tat thng tat cm into my head,I regrt such a way.I nvr thnk abt past and regrt cz watever i had done,it tght me a lesson that I oni can learn frm such situations.Regrdin busnss,I realzd whatever i do doesnt matter hw gud i deal wit sum1 in the end its al comes to sales.Without sales,nothing else matter so I dig deep down hw could I sell my ideas.I realzd selling a product is less prftble thn selling a skill 4 mankind.Ltr I realzd by being a doctor I cld oni tc of few at a time,bt by being in busnss I cld touch life of millions of ppl at a time..Frnds n fmly is the bad partnshp in busnss.I sensed a manager n sales persn both dealing with ppl but their pay is diff for a reason.One fllw guidelines prep by sum1 n 1 prep the guidelines 4 othrs.Whn my frnds unncsrly volunteer to invst for my idea n self claimed to be a partner n orderin me not to include this persn n tat,he is the frst prsn i exclude.I dnt need mnny,I jst need visionary ppl tat can thnk beynd the edge not for num bt 4 the goal.I seldom see such ppl.Sumtim its lonely,at times its hectc,at times even famly doesnt gt the point for my act,bt whn the contrct basis fckd up systm scrw up life of mny dctrs,I wil help thm to lead a hppy life.My cntry is worst wit capitlsm i realzd.Sum race r insecure,sum r extrmly greedy n sum r lazy bt even if I fail,I blve I wil learn sumtin useful frm it.

Ghost

Ghost
Since I hv to b alne for 4 dys,ntg seems interesting thn sharing abt ghst.For many tht tpic remain as a myth,prhps an advntre wit adrnaline rush incldin 4 me;once.Many nvr believe such tings bt frm my exprnce,nvr evr rent a hz that bein given at a cheaper rate cmpre to othr houses in a buildin.Befre I saw 'them',i tot its fun n wondering whn I can actly see thm bt once I felt their presence and literally saw a lady smiling and vanishing passing the room door,a guy with a black hat starin at me,small kid crawling on the bedside ,burnt man,some ugly devilish huge head creatures,hairy spooky figures etc rit infrnt u whn u opn ur eyes sudnly in the mid of nit,darkness and sleep arent a peaceful ting anymore in life.These r just few exmp bt hnstly those arent ghst,mayb sum roamin spirits ..The gud thing was,I hv never seen any of them twce excpt this girl befre an Uzur finally believed my stries aft saw me losing weight day by day.The holy wordings arnd the wall and the nails at 4 crnr of the bed rly helped excpt whn I cm bck hm after late bloody ot nit or aft forensc autopsy classes.That nite I was alone n while passin my frnds room,I saw a girl sitting at the edge of the bed.I told my self tat its my imagination.I sensed it wasnt a joke anymr when the stdy table's drwer opnd itself the moment I close my eyes.That was the first time I saw tat whte figure with long hair,almst floating at the corner of the bed pointing finger at me.Studies slp n peace gone jst like tat for 1 n hlf year n hw I survived,recvrd n the rest of the distrbnce was history.Whatvr it is,it made me brave to such extnd that being alone in a haunted hz nvr bother mch.Yet wking up looking at sum1 staring at u,sitting crwld on top of cupbrd,stndin at the door,sitting on top of u trying to choke u,or hnging on top u frm the fan or the male female combo weird voice n the whspring kinda traumtc up to this day.Such things frm diff dimension oni seems fun til we see them with our eyes.No friends wil b there even whn thy knw they shld.Its btwn u,the spirit and a split moment betwn life n death.Keep your pride n ego aside.It can shatter in a second when such ting pay u a visit.

Persuasion

Despite hw mny times I told him,he stil wanted to do that shitty busnss.For me,if u work 10 hours in small scale busnss u shld earn atlst 200 bcks per day.If u spent 10 hours under hot sun n earnin 50bcks,it means u're swiming in red ocean,not blue.End of the day,he askd me,'if u can manipulate others,why u din do the same n sustain ur relationshp?' 😁Manipulation,persuasion shld nvr be used in relatshp n wit real ppl othrwse whle life wil b fake.
He reminded me this grl..She used to say tat she cant pretend as me.She cant sweet tlk as me.
On Chrtsms eve yrs bck,whn we went 4 dinner, instd of chckn thy gv sirloin steak,whch was clearly a mstke.She gt mad cz i talkd ncly wit the chef instd of scldin him.I didnt do tat cz I tot what if he spit on the food b4 he serve it..Once,jst befre we board the flight,the chckpoint lady literlly tk the extra mny tat passngr kept,not allwin leavin the cntry wit more than 500tk.She said its their new law.Frm far I saw she divided the mny wit the male wrkrs n wit their mouth full on smelly paan n devilish look,raisin voice def wont hlp..She strtd scldin them n makin chaos.I dnt wish to do the same cz thy dnt want to let her board the flght.Bngla is capable of anytin if u challenge their ego.I tlkd in a nice way tat we're stdnts n we need cash to cm bck etc n gt it solved bt tru out the journey she said im cowrd.Once a rickshw guy wnt over speed n hit a car despte my warnin to slow dwn,almst gt herself killed cz she felt on the opp side of road.Once im sure she is fine,I whck him rit on the spot.She said im an idiot for shwin anger such a way.I b myself almst al the time n these r few exmp hw it went bad almst al the time.For me I knw what im doing n hw I shld bhve at moments,bt othrs nvr understnd my act.
I learnt;U can lose in order to make a real soul win,u can hurt someone if u sense it will bring them good in long run,u can make urself look lk a fool for the benefit of few people,u can let people humiliate u for the goodness of ur own but doesnt matter what,u should never let someone take u for granted.Selfishness should be payed equally doesnt matter whch way.You decide ur way.

Hope

Apparently when you treat people the same way they treat you,they get offended..Yet reason why you wont let go of what's making you sad is because sometimes,it was the only thing that made you happy.It's very easy to judge how long someone going to stay in your life.How someone reacts to your sadness says alot about how long they're going to be in you life.Sometime great change happens only after the worst change occurs.Negativity can be the start point of positivity.Destruction can lead to creation.Its not hopeless.Darkness is the birthplace of hope.In the past I met people tat said hope is an imaginary word and action speaks louder than words.For me,every hope,every dream starts as an imaginary words,as a hope in someone's head.That word is what leads to action.Otherwise visiting the moon which is 100% not practical wouldnt be achieved by mankind.Everything starts as a word in the head and as a hope in the heart.Apart action,words too do has its own magic,in much superior way than action; but only for those who can see it and believe it.

Willpower

Willpower isnt a skill tat can b taught the same way kids learn to do mathz.That is why it doesnt remain constnt frm day to day.It is a muscle like thing like bicep.It gets tired as it works harder.So if u want to do something that requires willpwr,like going for a run aft wrk,u hv to conserve the willpwr muscle during the day.If u use it up too early on tedious task like wrtin a boring mail,waking up aft many snooze,etc all the strength will b gone by the time u gt home.Pay attntn to the day when u wk up on ur own happily n on days when u hv to force urself to wkup despte ur annoyin alarm.Bck in Bangladesh I sensed all the student tat styin in hostl tend to play,go out have fun as us that stying in aprtmnt alone bt at a certain time period of the day,they wil open their book n stdy n they do this everdy.I realzd they not using their willpower bt they make it automtc by making it a habit to stdy at 9pm to 12am daily.That doesnt requires willpower energy to overwork cz that habit already bcm automtc with time like a skill of playing basketbll which with practce n time wil turn into reflex.U use less brain input to prcss ur decision lk how u gona thrw the ball next.U jst knw what to do.Then I wondered why its hard for me n my Malaysian frnds to attnd the classes bck thn whle othr stdnt frm diff countries managed to do it.Both of us dont like the lectures as well bt they managed to do it n we found its extrmly hrd n required tons of willpower to move our ass.Then i came across this exprmnt and learnt sumtin.One able to create the willpower relatively easy while others struggled..I was wonderin wht causing the diff..A kid age of 10 that their parents send to piano classes do much better with their homewrk.I realzd no one like such classes on weekends and almost all forced themselves to do it in the beginin,bt by prctce for an hour for weeks,thy make it into a habit whch bcm autmtc to them.The good thing wit willpwr is tat once it bcm strngr,it touches everyting.Once u stop smoking ,soon u stop drnking soon u stop eating unncsry.That automatic habit builds ur self discplne.With self discplne,seeding a habit for a bettermnt is way easy than those strggling.

Tshirt

Few days bck,we were tlking abt someting n one of my frnd that cm alng askd us hw we had the willpower to wrk our ass off to burn 20 30kg without any supplmnt,roids,gym and cardio mchne whle facing so mch of difficulties being in a foreign cntry,hving rough life unlike othrs.Exctly a year n half bck,I sat at the road side bus stop near my clge with this guy here.Life seemed uncertain for 3 days,evryne arnd us played their tricks with our soul n mind.Money n human shwd their clr.Oni family and few real soul was with us.We made fmly suffered alng with our misery.Unforgtble n unforgivable days.Willpower isnt a skill.We can cook a perfct chckn soup on Mondy and we can repeat it again on Frdy bt if its a skill,many of us could go to gym or jog strght away aft wrk on Mondy but the same week on Wed evening,we mght feel like doing ntg,sit infrnt of our laptp,wtch a mvie and cmptly hate lifting that day...Have u ever wonder why?..if willpower is a skill,it should be getting better day by day but whtz hpnin here was diff..I tried to figure out the secret and when I found it out,I used it to him as well and it works almost in every aspct of our life,incldin stoping a bad habit like binge eating.Before I contnue,this guy that askd the question interrupted,'so u guys r millionaires?' 😒
'Of cz no but we will be because we working,planning and learning abt the secrt each and everdy',I replied.
He said there's no such ting as secrt,al u need is hrdwrk.🙄
Whn I designd a tshrt n sell it,i tot desgnin,the art is the key bt ltr i learnt,its not the art,its the prcss as wel.If a tshrt that ned to b dlvrd withn 3 days reach aft 10 days,it gt scrwd.That is why the prcss is so mch imprtnt along the othr aspct.We not jst learning the prcss bt we mastering it before fully executing.For me,i felt thats the smartr way thn do unncsry mstks,waste so mch of time n mny n eventually gv up.We mght try 5 times bt trying 1 time a year wil toll u 5 yrs of life.Its not abt hrdwrking,smrtwrk shld b there too frnd.Most of the time we clean our house tgtr til we sweat af and I told him,thats our cardio.The greatest thing abt him was,he wont jst listend n close his room door;he wil do it for real af.

Thalassophobia

When I was a kid,thalassophobia wasnt an issue at all for me.When we saw a place that can b turnd into a swimming pool,we(cousins n I) used to swin n caused so much of chaos til one day when we came bck,I saw my uncle was getting rdy to make a police reprt assumin we went missing.Most of the time,the biggest rgrt will be when we went too deep into the jungle to reach the sea bcz of the tides.U can oni see water if u go deeper,othrwise its full of mud at the nearest shore and we have to walk al the way bck hm once done.The hungr,thirst n lassitude wil b devastating yet our retrd brain wil nvr learn frm it to pre- plan food n drnks back then.Luckily no Naegleria Fowleri ,rare amoeba found only in freshwater nvr enter through my nose and ate my brain,credits to my country cz pathogenic species of N. fowleri have not been isolated from Malaysia bck then(up to 2011,no idea abt nw).That name N.Fowleri was a pain in the ass word durin micro viva,the whole subject indeed.Whenever we gt caught for swimin in ppl's prprty or we saw the owner cmng,we wont run bt we walkd to him and admt our mistks n in return we used to went bck home wit sncks n chips despte our 'crime'.I rmbrd the stry that sun n wind tryin to prve who is great by makin a man gt off his coat quicker.The hrdr wind blew,the tightr the man clutched his coat to him but the sun cm out frm the clouds n smiled kindly n he mopped his brow n pulled off his coat.I learnt since then,gentleness n friendliness were alwys strngr than fury n force.Frndly apprch n appreciation can make people chnge their mind more readily than all the bluster n storming in the world.

Gays

Today,I shared certain story that might seems inappropriate for some.Few strtd to gv lecture tat its not good to post it like tat.Whenever i post such tings,I hide it frm the persn tat msgd such a way cz i dnt wana hurt thm bt i stil post it so tat othrs wont repeat it..Some said he said it in nice way 😐 Does wana tch ur d*ck,f*ck ur ass seems funny n nice? 😒If someone keep repeatin aft I let them knw in a good way,do thy deserve thrd chnce? If in persn,his nose mght b deviated n bleedin for such a disgusting manner..The thrd pict isnt a gay,it was a grl brotha.Grl boy gay pondan watever it is,gv respct and take respct.Dnt misuse  politeness.One of my brotha replied to it saying 'he mst be joking and nothing serious about it' sharing his point of view ending with no 'hatred peace'.I replied I didnt take it serious too ,be safe and take care.
For the first time I sensed someone feeling that 'be safe' is kinda weird for greeting.Hehe..So far only one person had used 'be safe ' to me whn ending the convrstn even before I use that word.No one else ever said it before me excpt this one grl.I realized people who shared something that seems bad for someone else's eyes forget it the next second and people that said everything is cool is actually had something in their head.Its very confusing with human at times..The way people say and think never really tally most of the time.There was this incdnt once where a locksmith was working for hours to repair the lock of a door back in Bangladesh n even aft 2 hrs he didn actually fix it.My frnds paid 600tk without a question bt when anothr guy came n fix it in less than 20 mint,they refused to pay even 250tk to him.I gave the balance to him n while going bck I asked the guy hw he did tat..He said in the beginin he too took hours bt wit time he bcm exprt n managed to fix it in couple of mint.I realzd ppl dont actly value the work n fact, their mind believes the longer he works(even he screwd it)the better he is.Mayb I should do the same with my work in any aspct.Drag it,twist my words,delay my work,hide,lie,prtnd,shw fake smile and earn more.Speed,honesty,be real never really tally with excellency n expectancy at time.

Plateau

Plateau
When plateau hit me hard,I measure the circumference of bicep,chest ,waist etc,keep them recrded,cover my whole body with long sleeve whenever I train,take less pict for a week,and the mst imprtnt thing,never look at my bare bdy infrnt of a mirror..Its my own psychology to excite my mind that there is actually sum sort prgress hpnin and Its jst tat I dont knw it yet.To knw the result,to make the result count week ltr, to make the mind muscle connectn wrk better than before,this methd wrks well for me.This never fails to help me whenever situation,studies,envrmnt,mny etc hit me hard with diffclties.I maintain my anchr tru out the year.I teach my brothr the same way aft 5 weeks of trainin durin the 2nd phse.. n he asked me,'how la bro,how to stand naked infrnt of a mirror without looking at urself.?
I replied,'how la bro,how cm u cant even figure out ur own way for this simple thing?Im not feedin u food,im teachin u the way to make ur own food and to feed urself.You can use this way to feed others too,oni if u could use the greatest gift God gave u,ur brain in an efficient way.If u cant take cntrl of this simple ting,u cant take cntrl of ur life when something big hit u hard on ur face.Every big tings strts with a small win,this small manipulation enable me to train tru out the year ignrin any sort of distrctn.This methd tght me to wk up on my own at 530am every mrng to stdy the books that I feel like stdyin.Im not forcin it at all,cz the mind strtd to blve that its fun learning things,the same way it believed its fun trainin everdy.Again,this small way chnlld me into lots of new ways that I nvr discvr previously.All we need is a new method for a bigger plan.

How to Remove Lens

Contct Lens 👀

Jst b4 I leave,my sis cm bck frm school, asking me if the cntct lens is stil on her eyeball..The cntct lens was there bt it adhered to the surface of the eye(rt) and she cant rmve it despte hw mch water or eye mo she put tanx to the heat and the suckin effct of the lens..As if the lens never let the eye drops to enter insde the lens to lubrcte it for easy remval..House M.D taught me that we can use onion to detect Sjögren's syndrome bed side.With my mum making the situation tensed,no proper ent instmnt,going to a clnc n payin unncsry 100bcks cheque wil b the last resort I realzd.So we tried the onion therapy 😆 n to my suprse that onion didnt brng much tear even aft 40 sec 😐.Not oni material stuff,even China's onion sucks.I thrw the onion a side ,brght Australian orange for the help.As usual,Aussie was helpful n I managed to rmve the lens easly by making the eye to prdce its own tears.🍊saved the day,bt extra 5mint teary reddish eye was the bonus she incurred,stil worth not wasting the Rm100.😊

Dogs

Aft fnsh my wrkout,I went to a chnse shp to eat.I saw the ownr gv al the left over bones to the stry dogs bsde her shp.I jst smiled at her,she smiled bck n told me,they r very loyal dogs n it seems the dogs wil tc of the shop at night.Hw sweet..Frm there I went to a barbershp to shave.I saw 2 indian grls passd by there wit pbsm tshrt and one of the grl was on phne,not tlking to one persn on the phne bt the whle shplot;her voice was tat loud.The frst wrd I heard was a terrble bad wrd tat even I wouldnt use in such a pblc plce.I notcd she said to tat persn on the phne,'wtf u dstrbin me again n again like a dog?'Mayb sum relatshp issue.I was wonderin abt the way ppl see a dog.Did u ever realze dog is the oni anml tat doesnt hv to wrk for a living?Hen lays egg,cow gv milk,canary sing bt a dog make his living by gvng us ntg bt love n loyalty.Even a cat wouldnt b tat loyal.My cat jst ran awy the mmnt I set him free,nvr even turn nor cm bck.The way we see a human resmble the way we see a dog.Sum see it for its loyalty n sum see it as annying.We r the weakest species on earth.We cant run tat fast,clmb a tree like mnky,swin like a fsh,bt we hv sixth sense unlike othr species tat make us special,yet mst of the time we nvr chnl it in a prpr way.Ego,greedinss,anger,jealsy n etc..Mst of the time,we failed to see a human as a human in the frst plce.Hw we label a dog,a human, reflct us,not the dog.Some pure soul like a dog stay the same eventho our lens varies.It wasnt the dogs fault,but us,humans.

Misunderstanding

Yesterday,I had a small misunderstndin wit my frnd.It strtd month ago wit variation of mindset n yest I ended it in a very bad way.I said thngs that rly rude n hurtful to this 2 yr old frndshp.End of the argmnt,she cmplty blck me.I dnt even call her to make thngs btr bt I knw I was respnsble for her tears.I didnt tk it serious bt for her,my wrds mght hurt her so mch tat she labelld me as male chauvinist,a persn tat wil attck a grl wit acid etc.Ntg make mch sense bt that acid etc made me felt dwn cz I born wit a grl jst a mint diff n I'm well aware tat no mttr hw strng a man is, he was brght to this wrld by a woman.I cmprd this pure soul,I criticised n condemn her in a way tat I really shdnt.I wishd she could argue few mint more.I told her I wishd this day nvr cm in my life bt I sensed that it gona chnge my whle way of dealing wit ppl.I was thnkin whle day n i cm to my sense tat any fool can criticise,cmpre,cndmn n cmpln bt a great man shws his greatness by the way he treats little man.I wil nvr use mch bad wrds aft this.I wil speak ill of nobdy n i cm to my sense tat God himself does not propose to jdge a man until the end of his days,why shld I..I told her I wouldnt cmpre prevsly bt I did again.Sometime sum ppl left us not cz we done to many mstke bt cz we done the same mstke too mny times.I wishd she would frgve me a day.I wish I can b a bttr persn this cmg days.I will.See u on tv a day grl.All the best.

Habits

Aft went to temple,I went early to gym cz I wana spend time alone reshuffle my own stuff cz its gettin messed up since the day I cm bck.Once I entrd gym,the caretkr askd if i dnt hv any job,why Im so early.He askd my age n said i looked way too old n when I said I stdied at Bngldsh,he strtd his own review same as othrz.I hv no idea abt the dr out there.For me,hw i see myself is diff.The frnd of mine tat went 2 yrs ltr thn me to India graduated n every1 cmpred abt it to me.Let me shre hw I wrk eventho im stil not offcly wear my whte coat posin wit a steto arnd my neck.Lets kp this prsn idnty confdntl(this prb was in bngldsh).She had 2 kids n the son frqntly had diarrhoe n stmchache pst 6 yrs.He gt well wit med bt the prb kpt repeatin n no dr could cure the root bt thy mnge the symptm wit med n albndzle past 4 yrs.For sum its lk im blwin my own trmpt bt i dnt gv othrs rghts to dwngrd me.She told me wit tear abt the prb n i sensd tat the sistr was fine despte bth eatin the same food the mum cookd.I wnt to their hm n obsrvd what wrng.Aft sumtime i knws wats wrng wit the boy by observin them.They play outside mst of the time n this boy here n had a hbit of bitin nails.I realzd there is whr the prb lies.Bittin nails past 6 years is a chrnc psychological prb n its not easy to crct it wit meds or asking him to stp.Stght frwrd thrpy nvr wrks wit addctn if u realze as a human.So that day I went bck n was thnkin hw to solve that prb..bck in Bangldsh,the Dr's arnt as arrngnt as Malaysian.They listen to us(the hghr their post,the hghr their arrgncy )..So I was thnkin a way to solve it without involvin drs cz I knw no one like it whn we crct them n no one hv tat mch time for othrs.That night,aft thnkin so mch I sensed I cant solve it myself n went bck to the boy the next day..Whn I askd him,he explnd to me hw he felt b4 he strtd bitin his nails..

10,000 Hour Rules

Most teams aren't really teams.They're just guys who wrk tgtr.I never wish to train someone who is doing fine in their life.I felt train and chnge a persn life means more than their physique.I realized some ppl r so hard to bring into a belief.It wasnt God that mattered.It was belief itself tat made a diff.I sensed belief was the ingredient n belief can oni b achved by lead by an exmple.Ppl might be skeptical about their ability to change if they're by themselves,but when we do as a group,as a family,it wil convince them to suspend disbelief.A community creates belief and I turn people that believe in me into a #tlgn community,more accrte,into a family.I spread the knwldge I have,how to build muscle without gym equipmnt,jst by trainin at tat home,hw to lose weight without even a single cardio,supplmnt,or a single drop of steroid,all by altering metabolism,using hiit,iso,fst7,sex trnsmutation,med,anat,physio,food,every single shit I knw into pre plannin.It mght b slow,bt its way healthy than stroid shit.That wat real excse is al abt..Some need all n sum need few n the rest needs a listenin n blvin soul..It mght b oni few ppl nw bt soon we wil turn this cmmnty into thsnds n fix any kind of addction,misry,heartbreak,prb into opprtnty n gold.My brotha askd what if someone try to take ur plce when u teach everytin to a strngr.That 10,000 hr is the key.Whn I wrked 2000 hrs alrdy,the snake that workd oni 200 hr wil nvr ever b able to take my plce.I mght told him 300mg /day is the lvl of chlstrl intke for us.Bt if he went out there n pretnd as if its his own hrdwrk knwin everytin to a heart pt who shld oni tk <200mg/day,he wil gt tat persn killed.Thats the diff.

Forgiveness

• The nxt day,I wnt bck to the shop,askd sorry to him and I explaind to him why i need the chckn without skin n fat.That 1 mint converstn made him understnd n whnever I visit the shop again,he gv the best for me,worth the money.I went to my auntie's plce,I cleaned her hz,chnge the bed sheet,buy al the food she need,boil the wtr,prep meds n explnd to  her why i cant stay there..I realzd evryting can b solved jst by prctce of deep communication, talking,listening n explainin.When we listn to the words frm their own mouth,the assumtion that we made seems totally diff .They have al the rights to say yes n no for something..That way,I nvr comprmse n we both win the situation not that i lose n she wins..When the circle of influence sucks we bcm an ass I realzd.No wonder it is bein said that wars are won in the general's tent.Some day,in the years to cm,we wil be wrestlin wit the great temptation or tremblin under the great sorrow of our life.But the real struggle is here,now.Now it is being decided whethr in the day of our suprme sorrow or temptation,we shall miserably fail or gloriously conquer.Chrtcr cnt be made excpt by a steady long continued process and it al strt by tlking, understnding and listnin.

Relationship

• At nght I went to wtch mv wit my frnd.I went to a diff plce cz I dnt wana see any 'unwantd' ppl.My bad luck,i saw this 'frnd' of mine.She saw me too bt she ignrd me.The same grl ,a mnth bck,when she had a dental prb n sufferin wit pain n exm,I went and searchd for topicl benzocaine at each n every phrmcy in Ctg.Aft more than 1 hr,I found it n bght it for her.Thats jst one exmple.She was so nice til the moment she left to Mlysia(As usual).It wasnt new for me bt I dnt knw why whnever she havin prb,i cant help myself to avoid her bt wil b there for her.For anyone facin hrd time.Whle exitin the mall,my frnd saw her strtd to poke me sayin tat 'look,that ur gf/ex/frnd n she cm here n going bck at 1am aft a mv.Did u see if she cm alone or with a guy bla22 😒.Doesnt mttr hw mch i ignre her,her sight alwys gv so mch of pain cz I can nvr frgt nor fgve her.This kind of so cld strght frwrd mthrfck doesnt matter cousins,siblings,frnd that sit bsde u tryin to gt into ur head is a real prb that wil spoil ur day n ur repo.(i shre more abt this type of frnds ltr).I was so down for a moment..The feelin was very unplsnt.I saw her car bhnd me.I tried to ignre her again.Whle waitin at the trffc light,I asked myself..Whats wrong wit u..U was well al this whle n whnever u cm bck here,the same shit hpn again n again..U cant run frm prblms n heartache.Why Im no more proactve bt bcm reactive for everytin..why i let othr ppl's wrds ruin my day.Im reactin for everytin,no more respndin.Aft all,she was the grl tat meant the world for me once n doesnt matter she like me or not,as long as she is hppy,it shld b fine for me.As long as she is under my sight,she is my respnblty.She is jst anthr human as me,n I dnt knw whats insde her head nw..I hv my self wrth n I wil set her free frm tdy,I told myself.I turned n look at my cousin,askd him to STFU n fllwd her car al the way bck not to stalk her bt to ensure tat she went bck safely.Its was rly late..Thats what a man shld do even if she dont like me anymre.I nvr knw what she fcing.Mayb she was depressd,she mght faced lot of prb,she's lonely or any legit reason that I nvr knw n mayb that is why she cm alone..Things can be seen this way too isnt it..

Hypo

What Im gona share tody wil be quite long,so I wil divide the story into few post.This is not for anyone but for myself,a reminder that I can read again in future when the same situation repeats.Past few days,as I shared before,my mood was extrmly bad as if im havin pms.
The incident strtd wit a helmet visor.Since the day i cm bck til nw,cz of roamin here n there under bldy hot sun,i bcm darker than before,I cant eat prply,I didn slp prply,I lose weight,i cant read fnsh my books cz my mum keep tlking wit me at nite n I lost my peace totally..I went to gt a visor for my hlmt cz when it rains,I cant see prply cz my glasses bcm wet.The ownr took the money,gv me the visor and asked me to fix myself.I tried for so long bt i cant fix it.It made me sweat af n aft 15mint tryin,I bcm mad.I went to her,askd her if one day u cm to my clnc ,what if i tk the paymnt,give the med n syrnge n ask u to inject urself?Is it ok?Hnstly i said it in such a rude way n the husbnd cm n fix it for me.He used few extra tools n bascly it cant b done by myself.She noticed I cant fix it bt she didn even ask if I need any help..Frm there I went to a chckn rice shop and askd him to parcl for me chckn for rm5.He mistknly prep 5 pckt of chkn rice.It made thngs worse..I sounded him n the worker if u both an idiot or what,cancel everytin,n walkd away frm that shop..I argued wit everyone tat day..I just dnt knw why.My bp was nrml.My unmarried auntie had a total knee replcmnt n Im the one who went n signed al the forms.She was under my care to b frnk n aft a week,I went to brng her bck.Pushin the wheelchr,carryin her stuff,payin,gting her med,went n brng the car that I parked far away to the entrnce etc ,everytin made me angry cz i didn even eat anytin n the road was fckin jam.The hypo making thngs criticl for me.At nite she cld n asked me to cm n stay at her plce.She didn even ask if I can bt asked me to cm.It made me angry even more.

Overthinking

Whatever happened yest was so fcking soul weakening.The enfeebled state made me lost interest to do anyting anymore for the day.It gt me awke at 4.44am,wit jst few hrs of slp.. Was thnking so mch til I decided to do sumting tat I hv nvr done for past 6 years.Im finally lettin go of every toxic ppl frm my life.There's so mch more to live than wastin time waiting for sumtin or sumone to hpn or cm bck.I wasted to mch time alrdy,overthnkin n blamin myself for othr ppl's mistke.So im letin go al the laughs we shared,al the memories we built.Its time to mv on wit my life,the same way everyone did wit theirs.Ppl that was on their deathbed frgt al my strggle that whle nite to gt them their n- acetylcystn when othrs dont even care n was ok when Dr said thy wont last a nite.A week ltr,they paid for my service as if it was a weedin.Thats human.U can buy a human's mind n hand to wrk 4 u,bt not their heart.I didn help any1 for mny.I dont.Money is a tool.I spend it for anyone anytime if i thnk they needed it n when I have it.Whn i dnt hv any shit,I spend my time.I wont bring al the mny to my grave.Tired of being gud shit,toleratin everytin.I can tolerate bt i cant cmprmse..N if u dnt gt bck frm me tmrw,knw where u stnd.When fllwin sumone,i felt likin their post is a form of respct but wasting time for sumone that thnk themselves so fckin great,unfllw even thy knw me well is bullshit.Im not ur fan..No one is that fcking great for me.I wil b there til the end for ppl who deserve,bt wil nvr waste my time for sumone who tk me for grntd.My circle wil gt smaller frm tmrw,quantity wil ⬇,bt the quality wil ⬆.Extrnly,I mght ugly af,full of scars,rude,arrgnt,bt deep insde,I was very real with whoever im with.I shw u what my brain n soul is capable of soon.

How to Apply for Job

Since I dont drnk n smke,I went to this place to a pool cntre to meet my brother to knw more abt hw to recruit sumone.I wanted to buy n read the book rgdin it bt that book itself cst rm135 (it was oni rm15 in Bangla n fck Malysia for this)whch I felt uncsry.Whle tlking to him,I learnt alot thngs since he was in HR.He told me whn thy recruit sumone,they wil cnfrm wt Bukit Aman to exclde sum1 wit crimnl rcrd.He explain more hw they judge an applctn.He told me hw they filter within sec who is a useless cnditate n who is actly a hrdwrkin persn.The simple ting was frm the diff hw a persn fill the mailin add n permnt add on the frm.Whn someone wrte their permnt add n  the mailin add as SAME AS ABOVE,the higher prsn autmtcly reject it within sec cz thy realzde hw lazy the prsn is(so spend few sec n wrte the add again even if its same).He also told me hw they judge a persn frm their handwrtin,their bdy language,their level of cnfdnt whle answrin the intrvws, who wil win amng batman n suprman(thy judge hw u manage ur time whle bein bsy wit life).He explnd a lot bt one of the imprtnt thng was the reason why thy stop wrking frm their past wrkin plce.Whatever reasn they gv,the oni reason tat HR recruit sum1 is when thy wrte there as- end of cntrct/to gain more exprnce/to learn more etc.Anyting such as prblm wit mangmnt,less salary,persnl reason,far /prgnt etc u failed at a glance.I learnt more bt he  askd me if im gona post it anywhere since i was jottin it  dwn.He told me revealin sumone brthdy or left open their form etc is a crmnl act for HR.Since im shring it openly n ppl mght learn few ting frm it try to dplcte it,b aware that they wil realze if sumone is cheatin or fakin aft 2 weeks of joinin,so be hnst whle applyin for wrk.He explnd hw I can safe guard myself as a boss n the rightz of emplyee.So if u try to fill a form for a job vacncy,be very careful n hnst.Any lie wil  cz u ntg bt ur time n learn tat fuckin Mandrin since it bcm a new skill n an interntnl language in Mlysia 😤 Doesnt mttr if u can wrte n prnce supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ,all u need in 2017 is the ability to speak Mandrin.
N i nvr win a single pool game,tanx to my kanadi.

Gym on Sunday

Gravity didn't hold us back from visiting the moon.Sunday and rain didn't hold me back from visiting the gym.🤗

Pre Planning

Once a week,half a day,I completely stp spnding time for othrs,stay at home,a small pause frm al my routines excpt my rituals and spend that halfday only for my self.During this mmnt,I plan my major plans for the whole fcking week.This is the habit that I created a yr bck whn I realized I cnt keep myself orgnized.When I wondered whats wrng,I realized the major prblm with plannin bck thn was,plannin for the day.Have a to-do-list for the day.When I was doing my pre med(Mlysia)the clge gv us schedule/timetble 4 the whle year.We can orgnze our hldy,pre book the tckt,stdy n prep for the exm earlr etc bt whn I went to Bngldsh,it was a terrible cultre shck.The schdle for major centrlzd exam wil b out a week or few days b4 exm,n thats oni cvr the wrttn xm,(the dates mght chnge anytime if they wanted to).Dates for Ospe ,viva prctl long case etc wil b out ltr, few days b4 the exm. So we nvr knw hw God,luck n time gona scrw us 4 the cmng mnths unlike other stdnts out there that judge me with their own assumtn.Hw cld sumone tat havin everytin in their life wit a gud flow would understnd my strggle.I dnt hate thm cz i realzd thy would nvr undstn what Im fcing.Thats whn i realzd abt this weekly plan since i cant hlp myself when the systm is al there jst to fck my life more.I pre plan for a week.There are activities that u can oni do during weekends,there r thngs that u can oni do in mrng,b4 2pm,b4 the prayers time,only aft 6 pm of wed n etc..Since then,i nvr apply this to do list for the day shit.I roam freely for others,but in my head,im well aware what im gona do for the next 2 days,the next 4 days.That way,I never miss the brthdy of ppl I see as fmly.I dnt depend Fb notifctn cz i dnt even have tat app in my phne.I keep those imprtnt things n dates in my head cz I alwys apply this -my mind is my coach.I dnt train wit others,I dnt depend on othrs anymre.I assess my grwth durin this time n I realzd i jst lost 3 kg of my hard gained muscle.That nvr brng me dwn at all,cz whn there is a prblm,there is whr the opprtnies lies I learnt.And whenever shit happns,thats the rmndr to strt again fresh,strnger n bttr than yestdy.
#0carbsday

Beef vs Indian

Beef vs Indian vs BB

Since that meal tasted so fckd up,i stopped here while otw bck frm the restaurant.I came here,I ordered fish patties without bun,sauce or any extra taste giving shit.While waiting,came this Indian auntie.She ordered chickn burgr n few minute later,another chinese boy cm.His left armed fully tattooed,look like a small town mafia king cm n  ordered beef burgr.I saw the ownr was cooking al of thm,fsh chkn n beef tgtr on the same pan.I was wonderin in my head if its okay since this whle scene rmnded me abt an incdnt.A video tht I saw while i was in bangladesh.An indian took a video bullyin the shp wrkrs cz thy mistknly gave beef assumin it as mutton.So this guy made a big issue ,recorded the whole scene.Im not againts ppls belief bt he askd the wrkrs(wrkrs was an indian frm India n it was so fckin clear that it was a mistake bt we all knew indian gt their supr pwer whn thy ingst club 99 or with their mates,without this two,most self claimed gangsta is a p*ssy).He askd the wrker ,'will u eat ur own mum?' Damn,such a powerful wrds but this same mthrfuckr wil tease an indian auntie who pass by wit sarees 😒 Maybe he meant it cz cow gv milk n we shldnt eat it..Hw abt goat then..Most drnk goat's milk yet stil enjoyin their spicy mutton curry durin weeknds ,gainin tckt to heart blck.Ok fine.Since indian hv gods in almst al kind of animal(fish,chkn n even pigs etc,dnt tel me no cz i hv seen thse gods pict)wtf fck we ate al that? its totally fine isnt it?No one can create  drama as indian.They wil treat visitors so fcking well n whck their wife at kitchn.No wonder in 20 yrs,india wil bcm the biggest muslim populated cnrty overtakin indonesia cz indian are so retard when it cm to this kind of silly issue.They fight n kill each other,giving al kind of space to others bt relucnt abt their own race cz of diff dramas.

Cholesterol

FAILED MEAL

Chlstrl intake shld b less thn 300 mg per day n this shit here itself contain abt 300 mg chlstrt.If you have been diagnosed with heart disease,on steroids,drnking beer evry fckin day,smking etc,this meal isnt suitable at all.
3-ounce serving of  calamari contains 1.6 grams of saturated fat and 5 grams of unsaturated fat. Saturated fat can elevate your LDL (LDL is bad lipid.It bring fat frm liver to vessel n HDL do the oppste so HDL is our frnd if in crct amnt).Calamari contains more thn 3 times as much unsaturated fat as saturated fat.So squit is gud for your cholesterol if you have a healthy cholesterol level, but if you alrdy have high fckd up cholesterol, you shld consume it as an occasional treat.When we try to make it abt 35g prtein,the chlstrl lvl incrses too..We realized adding this into our menu is not a good idea at all n we have to drop this from our menu.Past 3 days,I was seriously being an ass,asking to try variety of meals with a simple n most hardest term-should b healthy af,n tasty as well ,whch is a terrible combo during plannin n executin.Tat was the mistake.This shit almost taste as raw but Taj Taste of India was so helpful n tanx u so mch for tolerating my naggin.Once the shop is closed,the kitchn bcm our research lab.Definitely we wil cm up wit sumtin bttr soon n today's hustle wil be tmrw's success.If it works,I prmse I wil turn each one of those who believe in me into someone with a filled pocket n heart.Eventho it failed,the pleasure of eating ur own endeavour feels fckingg awesome.Just that the taste suck